We all know how people keep writing songs and poems about the lost children...
And we are all amazed by how much creativity a soul can conjure up...
Well I'm officially a lost child..may be girl..
I am lost when it comes to relationships..it seems that I have been left behind..
I am lost when it comes to finding myself..I'm yet to realize my full potential..I think that is a great thing...
I am lost when it comes to my future..I expect so much for me..and have so many dreams..that I'm afraid that I will never get there..
I am lost when it comes to age..I'm 24 and still growing up...
I am lost when it comes to people..I'm surrounded by so many yet..I can honestly say that none of them are my REAL people..
I am lost when it comes to the concept of SOMEONE
and so I am one of the forgotten lost people..
When I read what I just typed above..I realized that it is all not bad...I'm still growing..I'm still dreaming and I m smart enough to know the true colors of people..and most importantly I have not yet lost hope...
I think. Are all lost children in some aspect...waiting for our moment to shine...waiting for our moment of freedom...
Embrace the loneliness...
Some of the greatest people in the world started off like you and me...by being complete loners..
Here's to us..the lonely lost children...may we at least find each other...
God Bless you all
Hugs and kisses.
A slice of my life - Penny Says
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Friday, July 12, 2013
Going Home...for summer...
Well usually when you say your going home for summer holidays you get really excited...
This time for me i was more excited about the Holiday part of it than the whole Home part of it...???
Is it because all of my friends are scattered around the Globe making a name for themselves while i'm still in Med School??
Is it because all my favorite Cousins are settled out of the country and i'm left with all the Aunts..
Is it because i have to go visit my married/married and pregnant/married with kids...friends...and all my engaged friends and have to answer the horrifying questions of.."So what about you??? anyone special in your life???" and you go blank and say No...because the guy your dating is two freaking years younger to you and his parents will never allow it..
Is it because of all the corruption and stories of misfortune you hear as news from home each time you get on Skype with your mum..
Is it my own fear of proposals...
Or is this the way my Brain is, innately telling me that its time i get my life back together...and stop acting like a School girl and try to enjoy my Holidays and try to find myself a Home...
Some place i want to be..find something i love to do and work to achieve it..and to call it my OWN???
im gonna start prepping for USMLE...soon..so i think im getting there...:)
I need to feel excited about going home...but i will always be excited to see my mum...no matter how long i have been away or where i went...
Love you to pieces Amma..you are where my home and heart is...
God Bless all..
Hugs and kisses...
This time for me i was more excited about the Holiday part of it than the whole Home part of it...???
Is it because all of my friends are scattered around the Globe making a name for themselves while i'm still in Med School??
Is it because all my favorite Cousins are settled out of the country and i'm left with all the Aunts..
Is it because i have to go visit my married/married and pregnant/married with kids...friends...and all my engaged friends and have to answer the horrifying questions of.."So what about you??? anyone special in your life???" and you go blank and say No...because the guy your dating is two freaking years younger to you and his parents will never allow it..
Is it because of all the corruption and stories of misfortune you hear as news from home each time you get on Skype with your mum..
Is it my own fear of proposals...
Or is this the way my Brain is, innately telling me that its time i get my life back together...and stop acting like a School girl and try to enjoy my Holidays and try to find myself a Home...
Some place i want to be..find something i love to do and work to achieve it..and to call it my OWN???
im gonna start prepping for USMLE...soon..so i think im getting there...:)
I need to feel excited about going home...but i will always be excited to see my mum...no matter how long i have been away or where i went...
Love you to pieces Amma..you are where my home and heart is...
God Bless all..
Hugs and kisses...
I should really grow up now...:(
Define growing up?.."to grow toward or arrive at full stature or physical or mental maturity"
May be..but what i think growing up is, when you come to your twenties...means more about the mental,social and intellectual growing since you stopped growing physically by 24 yrs max for girls and 26 max for guys...
Sad story is i actually still hope that one day i will wake up THINNER and at least 3 inches TALLER...
The horror for me is never loosing the baby Fat i have gained in the 3 years i have been in Georgia...Thanks to the endless supply of late night junk food consumed during the endless cramming sessions that take place almost weekly...exams why do you kill me sooo...
More about the intellectual social part...
Does finally accepting and adding my Age on to my FB profile make me more mature???
Does finally telling people i just met my real Age finally make me all grown up???
Or accepting the fact that the guy im in Love with will never be my life partner due to Age barriers...
Or telling my mum that i would never be happy with a proposed marriage to anyone other than the Guy im dating/in love with...
Finally pulling my strength up and calling it quits with the guy because we see no future after Dating for almost 4 years...
Accepting and facing my mortal fear of being a Doctor one day..with many peoples lives in my hand...
Or even accepting and facing my Fear of snakes...
Will facing and taking any type of action concerning these, any one of these make me more grown up than i was when i started typing this post???
I think soo...
Growing up is all about Making Choices and facing your Demons...
So what am i gonna do after i finish writing this??? I'm gonna start with the easiest..no more lies...I'm gonna tell people my real age...
and embrace the fact that i actually don't look my age...
Heres to the Choices we make and for all the Demons we face everyday...
May we all have the Courage as the Griffindors and the Intellect of the Revenclaws to grow up a little everyday...
And to finally take Charge of our lives and do something good with it...
Because life sure is precious...
God Bless you all..
Huggies...
May be..but what i think growing up is, when you come to your twenties...means more about the mental,social and intellectual growing since you stopped growing physically by 24 yrs max for girls and 26 max for guys...
Sad story is i actually still hope that one day i will wake up THINNER and at least 3 inches TALLER...
The horror for me is never loosing the baby Fat i have gained in the 3 years i have been in Georgia...Thanks to the endless supply of late night junk food consumed during the endless cramming sessions that take place almost weekly...exams why do you kill me sooo...
More about the intellectual social part...
Does finally accepting and adding my Age on to my FB profile make me more mature???
Does finally telling people i just met my real Age finally make me all grown up???
Or accepting the fact that the guy im in Love with will never be my life partner due to Age barriers...
Or telling my mum that i would never be happy with a proposed marriage to anyone other than the Guy im dating/in love with...
Finally pulling my strength up and calling it quits with the guy because we see no future after Dating for almost 4 years...
Accepting and facing my mortal fear of being a Doctor one day..with many peoples lives in my hand...
Or even accepting and facing my Fear of snakes...
Will facing and taking any type of action concerning these, any one of these make me more grown up than i was when i started typing this post???
I think soo...
Growing up is all about Making Choices and facing your Demons...
So what am i gonna do after i finish writing this??? I'm gonna start with the easiest..no more lies...I'm gonna tell people my real age...
and embrace the fact that i actually don't look my age...
Heres to the Choices we make and for all the Demons we face everyday...
May we all have the Courage as the Griffindors and the Intellect of the Revenclaws to grow up a little everyday...
And to finally take Charge of our lives and do something good with it...
Because life sure is precious...
God Bless you all..
Huggies...
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
proposals....:((((
your mum telling you in the middle of exams that you need to seriously respond to the many proposals that she has found...is not a good thing....
now i cant concentrate...
life with a person unknown to my 24 years of lifee....for ever...
i cant live with a person i have NEVER known in my lifeee...
God knows who he is and what he is uptoo..
being a med student really widens your awareness to how weird, crooked in the head and sick people can beee...
Not a good timee...
sighhhhhhhhh
now i cant concentrate...
life with a person unknown to my 24 years of lifee....for ever...
i cant live with a person i have NEVER known in my lifeee...
God knows who he is and what he is uptoo..
being a med student really widens your awareness to how weird, crooked in the head and sick people can beee...
Not a good timee...
sighhhhhhhhh
Friday, November 23, 2012
Happpyyy St. George's Dayyyyy
helllooo world...
its a holiday in a hectic life of a med student...that means im right now..tasting the nectar of life...its 5pm here now and im still in my last nights PJ's on bed...refusing to leave it unless necessary...:P
well rarely does such a chance come to us poor fellows in this country..after being so used to the taken-so-much for granted poya days we have at home...getting an unexpected holiday like this on a weekday makes all of us break out in dance at school...i mean uni...which we did not..obviously..:)
St.George's day known as Giorgobas day here is a national holiday..being as this is an orthodox christian country..
when i innocently inquired my patho-physio teacher in class yesterday what the day meant...she told me this...
"st.giorgoba(george) kill evil thing with very big stick ...and we have goodness only..no evil..."
she is a sweetheart who tried to explain to me as much as she could about her holy day...
apparently St.George's feast day is today...and he is referred to as "the dragonkiller"
And the ever devout Christians of Georgia commemorate this day by going to church and praying to St.Giorgoba to protect them and keep them safe from all Evil...
well my day...was beautiful..i got up at 8am..brushed my teeth and went to sleep...then got up at 2pm..and caught up with all the much missed tv series...and now since im a Catholic too..after i finish typing this..im gonna say a prayer to St.George thanking him for the much needed holiday and to protect me from the evil snatches of my professors at uni tomorrow and for the rest of the year....and maybe next year too..:(
and them do i start doing my thesis on Hygiene in Sri Lankan communities...or not???
life can be such a party pooper sometimes..
Hope you guys out there are enjoying and partying like NORMAL people do on a Friday Night...:(
Have fun for me too..
God Bless us all...:)
its a holiday in a hectic life of a med student...that means im right now..tasting the nectar of life...its 5pm here now and im still in my last nights PJ's on bed...refusing to leave it unless necessary...:P
well rarely does such a chance come to us poor fellows in this country..after being so used to the taken-so-much for granted poya days we have at home...getting an unexpected holiday like this on a weekday makes all of us break out in dance at school...i mean uni...which we did not..obviously..:)
St.George's day known as Giorgobas day here is a national holiday..being as this is an orthodox christian country..
when i innocently inquired my patho-physio teacher in class yesterday what the day meant...she told me this...
"st.giorgoba(george) kill evil thing with very big stick ...and we have goodness only..no evil..."
she is a sweetheart who tried to explain to me as much as she could about her holy day...
apparently St.George's feast day is today...and he is referred to as "the dragonkiller"
And the ever devout Christians of Georgia commemorate this day by going to church and praying to St.Giorgoba to protect them and keep them safe from all Evil...
well my day...was beautiful..i got up at 8am..brushed my teeth and went to sleep...then got up at 2pm..and caught up with all the much missed tv series...and now since im a Catholic too..after i finish typing this..im gonna say a prayer to St.George thanking him for the much needed holiday and to protect me from the evil snatches of my professors at uni tomorrow and for the rest of the year....and maybe next year too..:(
and them do i start doing my thesis on Hygiene in Sri Lankan communities...or not???
life can be such a party pooper sometimes..
Hope you guys out there are enjoying and partying like NORMAL people do on a Friday Night...:(
Have fun for me too..
God Bless us all...:)
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
I should write more often
this is my post-of-shame...is such a thing exists...
I have ignored this blog...my getaway point for more than an year...
and what has it made mee...more miserable i might say and a complete sucker for companionship...
so i decided that since im anyway gonna be cuddled in a corner watching castle, white collar, greys anatomy, revenge and many more impossibly unrealistic tv series and counting my depressions away i might aswel do something that would actually take me out of the BIG BLUE spell im under...
well my life these days go on..as getting up going for classes..coming back...sleeping...unsuccessfully hitting the gym coz i have PUT ON 10 KGS since i came here...sighhh..and studying and sleeping...
i miss home..i miss the sunshine..the bright blue skies and THE REALFRIENDS..the ones who would come over take you out and make your life a BAG of fun...:)))
i miss going to places like Galle face..or even Galle since the highway opened...i miss the FREE FUN..we seem to have at home and which we seem to have taken so much for granted...
Its been months since i went out...chilled...the main reason..is i dont have the people to go with and the second is everything IS SOOO RIDICULOUSLY EXPENSIVE here..
either im too aloof...a born loner..or my type of kindred spirits are scarce....
im still thinking about it...
Im the shy type who doesnt make friends that easily you know..
ohhh life sure is a sucker punch at times...
Hugs and kisses to all...
God Bless.
I have ignored this blog...my getaway point for more than an year...
and what has it made mee...more miserable i might say and a complete sucker for companionship...
so i decided that since im anyway gonna be cuddled in a corner watching castle, white collar, greys anatomy, revenge and many more impossibly unrealistic tv series and counting my depressions away i might aswel do something that would actually take me out of the BIG BLUE spell im under...
well my life these days go on..as getting up going for classes..coming back...sleeping...unsuccessfully hitting the gym coz i have PUT ON 10 KGS since i came here...sighhh..and studying and sleeping...
i miss home..i miss the sunshine..the bright blue skies and THE REALFRIENDS..the ones who would come over take you out and make your life a BAG of fun...:)))
i miss going to places like Galle face..or even Galle since the highway opened...i miss the FREE FUN..we seem to have at home and which we seem to have taken so much for granted...
Its been months since i went out...chilled...the main reason..is i dont have the people to go with and the second is everything IS SOOO RIDICULOUSLY EXPENSIVE here..
either im too aloof...a born loner..or my type of kindred spirits are scarce....
im still thinking about it...
Im the shy type who doesnt make friends that easily you know..
ohhh life sure is a sucker punch at times...
Hugs and kisses to all...
God Bless.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Almost Home...:)))
Gone are the sleepy lecture halls....
Gone are the lousy teachers with foreign accents...
Gone are the rude neighbours who doesn't know how to have fun..Sri Lankan style..(which means really LOUD..)
Gone are the mean people who comment on us in difficult to follow words in a foreign language...
Gone are the pilles of books that kept me company for many sleepless stressful nights...
Gone are the horrible homework and reference books...
WELCOME...HOME...
yes im done with another sem...i haven't been home in like 1 and a half years...and im heading home in less than 48 hours...
whats in my bag...WINE...AND ...CHOCOLATE...i knoww..sounds Fun right...but now im brokee....:(((
but home means...
MOM
HOME
FRIENDS
SRI LANKAN HOT AND SPICY FOOD
FREEDOM
and much moree...
im just psyched about it all..
and i would love to meet up with all you people out there...who have been keeping me company in my most troubled and complicated hours...
I owe you guys big timee..
Love you all...
I will be posting from home SOON...
God Bless us all..
Huggies...:))
Gone are the lousy teachers with foreign accents...
Gone are the rude neighbours who doesn't know how to have fun..Sri Lankan style..(which means really LOUD..)
Gone are the mean people who comment on us in difficult to follow words in a foreign language...
Gone are the pilles of books that kept me company for many sleepless stressful nights...
Gone are the horrible homework and reference books...
WELCOME...HOME...
yes im done with another sem...i haven't been home in like 1 and a half years...and im heading home in less than 48 hours...
whats in my bag...WINE...AND ...CHOCOLATE...i knoww..sounds Fun right...but now im brokee....:(((
but home means...
MOM
HOME
FRIENDS
SRI LANKAN HOT AND SPICY FOOD
FREEDOM
and much moree...
im just psyched about it all..
and i would love to meet up with all you people out there...who have been keeping me company in my most troubled and complicated hours...
I owe you guys big timee..
Love you all...
I will be posting from home SOON...
God Bless us all..
Huggies...:))
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